shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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