Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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