I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
