question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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