There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
