do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
