he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
