One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
