I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Are we still banned from the library?
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
