i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
