This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
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He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
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Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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