I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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