So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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