69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
