I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
third nipple confirmed
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
