**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
id be glad to
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
