I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
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We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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