Porn is love you can see.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Randomize
