My boss' voice literally gives me gas
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
he was CRYING into my vagina
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I just had sex on a roof
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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