the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
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