So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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