im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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