Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
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