false alarm. still invincible.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
