At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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