Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again