I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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