Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
