i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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