OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
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We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
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High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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