So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the high leading the old right now
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize