okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
