girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
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My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
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You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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