I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just threw up on my dentist
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
