Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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