so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
