He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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