Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
