After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize