Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
