No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
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