am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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