He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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