I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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