and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
