Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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