..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I cockslap morals
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
