im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize