I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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