I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize