I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
